Blog: this fortnight’s energy farce is oinking ridiculous

DISCLAIMER: this little piggy’s energy blog is not taking sides. It is not going to follow a party political bias. Instead, it’s just oinking disgusted with every creature on the […]

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By Vicky Ellis

DISCLAIMER: this little piggy’s energy blog is not taking sides. It is not going to follow a party political bias. Instead, it’s just oinking disgusted with every creature on the manure-steeped farmyard that stands for our Government.

From the Tory Prime Minister who makes up energy policy on the hoof, to the crowing Labour Shadow Energy Secretary jumping on the Thick of It bandwagon.

This blog is going to heave a weary sigh over our tiresome political system which sees the Government (whichever party it is, they all end up doing it) toss out a nonsense bit of policy during the macho cock-fighting that is Prime Minister’s Questions.

Instead of admitting to a mistake – “I’m terribly sorry, Mrs Miggins, I let the sheep out to graze on your prize petunias, it won’t happen again” – the engorged media machine at Number Ten frantically tries to justify it: “Come now, Mrs M, we all know sheep need a varied diet!”

Of course, when something goes wrong for Old MacDonald, the rooster’s got to crow.

Now this week, Labour has gone to town on MacDonald’s cack-handed farm management, bringing back with it a whole set of tools from the hardware store which it claims will solve every problem.

The only thing is, some of them are looking a bit rusty. Either that, or very expensive.

The only person who’s not done anything quite so ridiculous is the Lib Dem Energy Secretary. Really, he’s done what the yellow-bellied crows have learnt to do best by now: sit on the fence.

The whole sorry steaming pile is enough to make this blog squeal out: “Cock-a-doodle-do-you-actually-do-anything-all-day-but-think-up-witty-one-liners-and-put-downs?”

Couldn’t everyone drop the political point-scoring for just one minute and put their shoulders to the plough to get things sorted? Would that have been so oinking hard? Apparently not.